


In Total Darkness I, I Reach Out and Touch

by AFangirlFantasy



Series: Insomnia [3]
Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: 50 reasons fic challenge, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Future, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Anal Sex, Bottom Harry, Domestic Fluff, Established Relationship, Famous Harry, Fluff and Smut, Gay Sex, M/M, Married Couple, Non-Famous Louis, Smut, Top Louis, married
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-15
Updated: 2017-10-15
Packaged: 2019-01-17 10:33:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,595
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12363813
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AFangirlFantasy/pseuds/AFangirlFantasy
Summary: Reason #1 - Because You Can't Get to SleepTomorrow is a big day for Louis and his husband, and it’s because of this reason that he can’t sleep. Turns out, poor Harry can’t either.Or a fluffy established relationship AU with some famous Harry all mixed into that.





	In Total Darkness I, I Reach Out and Touch

**Author's Note:**

> For this fic exchange, I wrote three different versions to the reason, "Because You Can't Get to Sleep." I only uploaded this one for the challenge, but look out for the other two being posted when the authors are revealed! They'll be attached along with this one, to a series. 
> 
> Part of the reason I wrote three is because of my own indecisiveness, and part of the reason is that I want to have something that appeals to everyone! Each story covers different ages, different tropes, and different sexual experiences. I hope that for now, you all like this one, and when the other two are posted - I hope you'll like them as well! This story is my favorite of the three (just saying lol). 
> 
> As always, I love you all sooooo much <3
> 
> In addition to my undying love, I also would like to share my immense gratitude to a few people who made this a whole lot better! Thank you [Amy](http://mummyamy10.tumblr.com/) for britpicking this and being amazing! Also, thank you to [Kayla](http://styleandsin.tumblr.com/) for creating the incredible manips!
> 
> *In this story, Louis is 36 and Harry is 34

   

Tomorrow is the day they find out possibly the most life changing news thus far, and Louis can’t sleep for shit. He’s anxious. It’s mere hours away, and he can’t calm his heart that is beating on a path of both excited and scared.

It’s nerve-wracking. 

For the sake of his husband, Louis tries to pretend he’s sleeping. But in the deepest caverns of his mind, Louis can hear the unmistakable sound of his husband sniffling, and he knows he’s up too.

Harry’s crying.

“Baby?” Louis calmly calls out as he turns his body over to inspect the situation. Harry though, stays hidden within the depths of their covers, protecting his face from being seen.

“Baby please don’t cry. It’s gonna be alright,” Louis soothes, using his arms to pull Harry against him closer, and rubbing his fingers along the panes of Harry’s back.

“Maybe,” Harry dejectedly says, “Or maybe not.”

“Hey, we can’t think like that. It’s a fifty-fifty chance. That’s not so bad.”

This time, Harry lifts his glossy emerald gaze to Louis, who internally sobs at the distraught state of the love of his life. Harry has been full on sobbing - red teary eyes, puffy cheeks, and swollen lips. It’s heartbreaking.

“Darling come here,” Louis coos as he pulls Harry in for a hug. As Louis begins to hold him close, he runs his fingers through Harry’s curls and speaks again, “I want this baby girl as much as you do, believe me. And it sucks, it fucking does, that there’s another family who wants her too. But the agency is gonna pick the family that they think is the best fit, and if it’s not us baby, we just try again, yeah? There’s a child out there that’s meant to be with us, I’m sure of it. It just might take a bit more time to find them. But once we do, it’s going to be so amazing, Hazza my love – that this will all be worth it.

Harry sniffs into Louis’ shoulder, and with a tired voice reply, “You’re right. You’re absolutely right. I don’t know why I’m being like this. I just want her so bad, but I know that if not her, there’s gonna be another child we’ll find and love just as much.”

“Don’t feel bad for feeling the way you do, I’m struggling too.”

“I just…I know this sounds bad, but I just don’t want to talk about it anymore. I think I’m gonna go crazy.”

“Want me to take care of you?”

One would think that by thirty-seven years old, and after being married for ten years, that Louis would be immune to the shade of Harry’s eyes, but he’s not. Louis has been a hopeless cause for Harry, ever since the first time his arctic orbs met forest green. It was a stupid uni party, where twenty-two-year-old Louis was just getting ready to leave when a certain boy caught his attention. Twenty-year-old Harry was a fucking beauty in his black skin-tight jeans, and flowy sheer shirt with embroidered flowers on it. Not to mention his long unruly hair hanging down to his shoulders - those beautiful curls wild and free.

Louis swears he almost dropped to his knees right then and there at the sight.

Unsurprising to anyone, it took no time at all for Louis to make Harry his. Though it took another five years before they were ready for married life. Truthfully, Louis was ready to pop the question after only a few weeks of them dating, but Harry had some years left to finish uni. On top of Harry needing to graduate first, they both needed stable jobs, and inevitably a place to live. In five years though, they did it. Albeit some bumps along the way.

For one, Harry wasn’t happy.

After completing his last three years, and for the sake of them living together, Harry got a job at a bakery to have an income. No matter how much they loved their shitty little flat or the fact that they got to finally sleep together every single night – Harry was craving more. His passion was music, and though Louis knew Harry loved him most, music was a very close second.

So in the mornings Harry baked, and in the evenings Harry sang. Any bar, any restaurant, any street corner he could find. Harry was singing for the world, just waiting for the right person to listen. And one misty June night when the muggy air stuck to every cell of their skin, it finally happened. As they were leaving this dingy pub Harry performed at, someone finally gave him their card.

Here is a fact that has always stood true regardless of past or present. Everything is better when Harry is happy.

Louis had just been hired at a secondary school to teach drama, his dream job, when Harry got the call that they wanted to officially sign him. Maybe Louis rushed getting married after that because he didn’t want any chance of losing Harry, or for someone to think he was available? Or maybe it was because it was the happiest times in their lives, and it felt like the next best thing he could do? But either way Louis bought the ring, and within a year after the engagement, married his only love.

To the industry and his fans, he was Harry Styles, but to his family – _to Louis_ , he was Harry Tomlinson.

After their honeymoon, Harry came back for a few short weeks. It felt surreal. Suddenly there were interviews, commercials, ads, photo shoots. Harry was needed anywhere and everywhere. The significance of it all hadn’t set in, however, until Harry’s first tour went up for sale. Because the boy who had been singing on the street corner hoping the world would listen, suddenly realized it had.

Every show in all 13 countries was sold out.

Louis tagged along when he could, but he had a classroom and a dream of his own. It was painful at first. It felt like Louis had truly lost Harry when three months had gone by of them not physically touching one another. There were calls and texts, of course, facetime every so often, but he was still lonely at best.

The first five years of their marriage went along the same way. It seemed almost like Louis was a cage that Harry would never be held down by. Flying off through the sky every chance he could. Louis would never have locked him up even if he could, not ever. But sometimes, he wished Harry would just stay because he wanted to. Because that was his home.

But Louis had forgotten what home felt like the first time Harry left through their doors for his tour, and hadn’t felt it since. There would be traces of it when Harry would come back to stay for a few weeks at a time. It would linger in the scent of Harry’s skin on their bed, and it would shadow behind them when they danced to Harry’s records, but it never settled down. Not then, at least.

Another twelve months had passed. Six long hard years of their marriage had gone by, when Louis had seen a magazine article of Harry with another man. The photograph caused Louis’ heart to physically crack at the sight of what looked like them kissing. The image was blurry, but it was enough. Leaving his ring on top of the magazine article in their kitchen, Louis packed up his belongings and left.

By the time Harry flew back, Louis was already gone.

It took months before Harry could convince Louis that he never cheated. That the kiss was on the cheek as a form of ‘hello,’ though the angle of the photo did them no justice. That he loves Louis more than anything in the entire universe. That he never in a million years ever meant to hurt his one true love.

Louis eventually came around, but slowly and in pieces. Harry couldn’t believe the mess he had made. The crime to Louis that he had committed. Harry may not have cheated, but he had done something far worse. He had ignored his vows to his husband, and left him behind for other things.

When they both agreed to work on their marriage, Harry bought them a house. He claimed it wasn’t a form of apology, because he could never wash away the stain of guilt on his heart. Simply, Harry thought it was time for them to leave their shitty flat for good. He could afford to buy them a lot nicer things, and there was no sense not doing so.

After the house though, it was a cat. A beautiful white cat with different colored eyes that loves Harry more than Louis. Louis doesn’t care, because honestly, if he were a cat he would too. However, after the cat, it was then a watch, and before long Louis woke up one morning to a car. It was after receiving the last gift that Louis finally put Harry’s spending to a stop.

He couldn’t buy back Louis’ love. It didn’t work that way.

Two weeks after that conversation, Louis was sure he had given up, when Harry had come back home oddly determined. Louis had not seen that look in his eyes since they were younger, and back then it was for his music.

“Louis,” Harry pleaded. “I love you. And I know that my love has not been enough these past few years, but I’m going to spend the rest of my life making it up to you. Remember our wedding? Remember my vows? I vowed to always be your ship. To carry you through any storm, and protect you from every wave. I vowed to always be alongside you, on this journey forever. Even when the night is coming down on you, I vowed, to find a way through the dark. I’ll never forgive myself for not making good on my promises, but I vow right now, to do all that and more. And to show you how serious I am, I did something so that I’ll never forget what I’ve promised to you.”

With tears in his eyes, Harry lifted up the sleeve of his shirt, revealing to Louis the large ship holding a permanent place on his arm.

“You got a tattoo, for me?”

“I got a reminder, for the both of us. If you ever forget how I feel about you, just look at my arm, and remember that I’m your ship. Always. With my every breath, I will love you past the storm is gone. I will love you for eternity.”

Louis kissed him senseless until they made love for the rest of the night. And when Louis had gone out the next morning, only to come back with a compass etched into his own wrist, the two knew things were going to get better from there.

And thankfully, they did.

During the three years after the tattoos, Harry had retired from performing, furthering his career in songwriting alone. Louis continued to teach drama, and every year the kids put on a show, Harry was now there - front and center watching along. Their love had grown immeasurably, and when Harry suggested going through the process of adoption, it came as no surprise. Louis was ready, more than ready, to bring a child into their lives.

Since the decision, it’s been a long road. Within the past month, they found the perfect little girl, but another family thought the same. Like everything before, Louis knows they’ll make it through this. They always have. But it’s no surprise that tonight they’re going to need each other more than any other. That’s why Louis asked, “Want me to take care of you?” Because he knows, he knows Harry needs to be distracted. Knows Harry is vulnerable, and needs a reminder of his love. Knows that as best as Harry tries to be his ship, Louis is his compass for a reason.

Because ships can’t sail without a compass to guide them.

And it’s no surprise when Harry whimpers out, “Please Louis,” into the changing air between them.

Harry never has to ask twice, before Louis’ lips are on him. This time, they’re drenched in adoration, as Louis lays a kiss in each and every wrinkle of Harry’s face. Harry’s hands come up to Louis' hips, settling there as they always do.

“Hazza baby,” Louis whispers, “You’re so beautiful. Always so beautiful. I don’t think I’ll ever get over it.” Pressing his love into every fiber of Harry’s being, Louis uses his mouth to seal the wounds in Harry’s stitching.

“Lou.”

“Don’t worry darling,” Louis’ warm breaths and cool lips promise into Harry’s skin, as they travel further and further down. “I’ve got you.”

Using his hands to massage into Harry, Louis tries to relax the tension built up underneath. He feels it bend to his will, releasing the pressure that Harry’s been keeping in. When Harry’s pliant, begging for Louis to do anything, is when Louis finally presses his finger in.

He goes slow, no need to rush as he takes his time feeling every stretch of his husband. Harry is withering at the sensation, though telling Louis he needs more. Louis gives in to Harry, because he always gives in - a weakness or a strength, he’s still not sure. Sucking on another finger, Louis presses in when it’s wet enough not to hurt. Every grip and press and touch is done with gentle care and love.

“Louis please.”

Louis pulls out, only to press further kisses to Harry’s thighs, an area he’s sorely disappointed he missed before. He gives them attention, though not as much as he wants, as Harry begs again.

Kissing his way back up, trailing every wonderful feeling he has for Harry into the tingles that get left behind from his lips, Louis comes back to Harry. Below, he lines himself up, but holds out from entering to take a moment to stare down into his husband beneath him. Though his hair is significantly shorter than it was all those years ago, and there are the beginnings of lines by his lustrous eyes, he’s still the most beautiful creature Louis’ ever had the pleasure to behold. “Harry, I love you. I love you so much. And no matter what tomorrow holds, we’re gonna be alright, baby. I promise.”

“Lou,” a tear escapes Harry, running away and into his hairline. “I love you more than every drop of water in the ocean. You are my everything.”

Harry reaches his head up to attach his lips to Louis, creating a current of electricity between them, that Louis will never be used to. And with their lips sealed, Louis pushes in, giving to Harry what he’s wanted all night.

It takes a while of Louis’ slow thrusts, and cherishing touches to bring them to their climax. But when it does, they bask in being wasted on each other’s love. Louis pulls Harry in tighter, and Harry grips onto Louis firmer, finally falling asleep with no lingering concerns to stop them.

And before they wake up in the morning, a call to Louis’ mobile leaves a voice message for them, that will change their lives forever.

_“Hello, this call is for Mr. Harry and Louis Tomlinson. This is Miss Whelan from the adoption agency. Please call me back at your earliest convenience. (A sigh of relief is heard) It’s good news, boys.”_

**Author's Note:**

>  _Thank you all so much_  
>  Here is the [rebloggable post](http://afangirlfantasy.tumblr.com/post/168900968806/reason-1-because-you-cant-get-to)  
> My Main Blog: [afangirlfantasy](http://afangirlfantasy.tumblr.com)  
> My Fic Rec Blog: [alarriefantasy](http://alarriefantasy.tumblr.com)  
> 


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